Her only desire/goal/ambition/aspiration/prayer/yearning/
POOF!
And the Fairy-God-Mother clad Universe granted her wish (because The Secret says if you want something badly enough for long enough you will eventually get it... or something like that).
Anyway, so it happened: the Disney Princess met her handsome Prince Charming, had the big plush wedding and lived happily ever after... until about six days after they returned from their honeymoon.
That's when the Disney Princess discovered that Prince Charming had to go to work to fund her lifestyle, and she was left home alone all day with the vacuum and her thoughts... then later in her marriage, the diminishing bottles of wine and packets of Marlborough Lites.
This is because nobody warned the Disney Princess that the “Wedding” and the “Marriage” are only used synonymously by real hard core romantics (who themselves have never been married).
Wed-ber's
Definition of Wedding:
“Paying
thousands of (name your currency) to feel special and perfect and overindulged
for one day without ridicule”.
Wed-ber's
Definition of Marriage:
“Realizing
that the person who seemed perfect at the wedding actually does all the things
that you do like fart, grow hair, cost money, smell, eat, snore, get dirty,
have needs, make demands and have an opinion”.
It
is usually at this point that a Disney Princess decides to become a Real
Housewife... because Disney kicks them out once they stop smiling and start
complaining.
Ella Roberts,
